


Not a Romance

by StellaCartography



Category: Star Trek: Voyager
Genre: Angst, F/M, Poetry
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-05-01
Updated: 2014-05-01
Packaged: 2018-01-21 11:18:53
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 576
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1548677
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/StellaCartography/pseuds/StellaCartography
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Resolutions: What was Kathryn Janeway thinking? This is my answer in poetry.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Not a Romance

**Not a Romance**

My life is not a romance novel  
Romantic heroines aren't scientists  
Left in strange places with medical databases  
And alien viral protein lists  
When the choice is death or being stranded  
I'll play the cards that I've been handed

My life is not a romance novel  
It's a heroic adventure tale  
Like Homer's Odyssey I'm lost at sea  
And home is my White Whale  
And I the Captain, intrepid and brave  
My companion: my faithful Maquis knave

My life is not a romance novel  
Though perhaps Chakotay's is  
The more they entwine, his turns into mine  
And mine becomes like his  
The romantic hero who lives to impress  
Come to aid a damsel in no distress

My life is not a romance novel  
I'm too cynical for happy endings  
Too damaged, too raw to remain much in awe  
Of love and reality-suspending  
Promises and ever after vows  
That ring less true than real life allows

My life is not a romance novel  
Though it's conspiring to become so  
With headboards, bathtubs and nighttime neck rubs  
I can't deny what I evidently know  
That when all is said and done we two  
Are the only somebodies this place ever knew

My life is not a romance novel  
My happiness is not predicated  
On this rogue's affection and manly protection  
He's devoted but I'm too dedicated  
To gaining our freedom, to bringing us home  
To our ship, our people: 'Til then we're alone

My life is not a romance novel  
And yet here we remain - he and I  
On our forced vacation of complete isolation  
Might it have been kinder to let us die?  
Or to keep us 'on ice' the rest of the way  
Let stasis fields hold my demons at bay

My life is not a romance novel  
But when his gaze scours my traitorous flesh  
My nerves are raving - a long-ignored craving  
Awakens and tears me apart afresh  
There's so much longing in those eyes of his  
I want to forget what was and embrace what is

My life is not a romance novel  
I remind myself with every breath  
It's a tragedy, but in loving me  
He condemns me to loss or himself to death  
For just when I think it has done its worst  
The universe reminds me: I am cursed

My life is not a romance novel  
But tonight I wish it were  
His heartfelt fable makes me wish I were able  
To allow what we both want to occur  
To at last shed the shackles of command  
Succumb to the sweet synergy at hand

My life is not a romance novel  
And just before the walls come tumbling down  
With a touch, a caress we're forced to suppress  
As the static, the voice, the unwelcome sound  
Of our dear friends calling to bring us back  
To our ship, to our lives and we turn to pack

My life is not a romance novel  
The part of it that was is at an end  
After time together I know him better  
Regret is a position I can't defend  
Now our starship and crew lie between us  
I'll bury all scraps of unseen lust  
Under years of training and duranium rust  
And my heart will dry out and turn to dust  
And I'll never again be able to trust  
Myself in his presence, although I must

My life is not a romance novel  
He just makes me wish it were


End file.
